Another sad story.

I’m usually not my best when I’m in a relationship, & just dunno why. So I prefer to be single (and ready to
Nah, seriously, he gotta be sum1 who will love me more that I can ever love him and would consider me cute at my worst, or else it’s totally not gonna work. đŸ˜‰

Tried & tested.

I want my aura back..
When no one could ever hurt me.

I know everything happened really fast between me & Ryan. And after just a month together I moved here in Dubai to work as planned even before having him. First couple of months were easy going. And now Im on this wild ride or maybe a bad dream and I wish to wake up soon.

Couple of times he told me he was going to meet his ex office mate somewhere have coffee and hang out maybe. Then last nite I asked if this office mate is a girl. I should hv asked him even before, but thinking that it was a guy, I ddnt mind. And yea SHE is a she. My hands felt cold. I told him I dont want him going out with her alone. He said they were just friends. okay. But whats the dinner for? They could like go out with some other friends, or just the other friends. This pisses me off, till this second while typing this. When I asked him not to go, he was like insisting that she is an old friend and that they usually do that because theyre friends. Like I cant stop him to go. It felt like Im JUST the girlfriend and this girl happen to be the friend. Then the girl cancelled the dinner, idk y.  And early this morning while me trying to sort things out, whenI asked him if the girl ddnt cancel, he said he’d still go. Im like ‘whaat? even i asked u not to?’ he started to sound annoyed.

I asked him a lot of questions but he answered only few. What does this girl mean to him? I fuckn dont know and I am so pissed that I cant get a fuckin answer. Im not sure which part of ‘we are in a relationship’ he fuckn doesnt get. We shouldnt be going out on some casual dinner or coffee dates. What the fucking hell were you thinking!! No fuckin guy/girl should come between us, what are you doing?? we were suppose to work things out cuz were like oceans apart! I hate this thing that u did and u dont even wanna hear about it. You want me to shut up cut the whole thing off though we desperately need to talk about this shit. What did you t0ld me? u said youre gonna hang up on me if i dont drop the shit and that it was the last conversation that were having for the day. ako pa tinakot. tss. BULLSHIT!! I would never ever hang up on u anyway, I can be mean pero hindi ganon. It just showed where am i in your life. Kinakaya kaya mo lang ako. And you dont care that ur hurting me. I thought was gna get some comfort, but i ddnt get a shit.

You make me fuckin sick.
Long distance shit sucks, i knew about it which makes it worse.
He sounded so mad, annoyed.
You made me feel like shiit!

I dont understand why I cant just let this pass. pagsalitaan ako gnon na lang. Tangina.

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